Roughing It

Nothing kills a good blog-post idea like a blank blogging-editor screen. It looks empty at first, but as I gaze intently, ghostly word images appear. They spell out spooky messages like, “I’m WAITING…!” and “tick, tock, tick, tock…” Brain freeze then seizes me, and not the kind you get eating ice cream. What began as an urge to express my thoughts becomes a voice screaming, “I command you to write something significant - NOW!” What it makes me want to do is find a firing squad, tap the head guy’s shoulder and beg, “Please, may I go next?”

Probably the most intimidating thing about trying to work in the blogging editor is the space at the top labeled
TITLE: (_______________). I have no idea what I’ll call my piece until I’ve finished a considerable portion of it. I don’t absolutely have to fill out that field first. But if I don’t, its emptiness stares, glares, and finally shrieks, “Fill me, you moron!” I can’t even breathe, let alone write, under that kind of pressure.

In an effort to overcome my fear of the blogging editor, I’ve put pencils and pads of paper throughout the house so I’ll be ready when lightning bolts of inspiration hit. I can’t tell when or where they will strike, but I’ve noticed trends. There’s the obvious pencil-and-paper spot – on the nightstand. I do think of funny things in the middle of the night. Or do they just seem funny because I’m not fully conscious? Whatever; come morning, my notes can be a bit difficult to decipher. Usually, ideas come while I’m doing something ordinary, like holding a frozen dinner to the vent-hood light, squinting at it, and trying to read the microwaving directions. Pad and pencil in the kitchen – check.

Many of us think most clearly in the shower. Sadly, somehow it’s not the most practical place to write. I have noticed, however, that I often get ideas while I dry my hair. Apparently aiming an electrical appliance directly at my head somehow jolts the inner-dialogue center of my brain. Pad and pencil at the vanity, definitely. Hey, as long as I’m in the bathroom, chaining a pencil to the toilet paper holder couldn’t hurt.

A fun thing about paper and pencil is that you can erase. Okay, duh, you can use DELETE on a keyboard to accomplish that. But it just doesn’t rock like erasing an entire paragraph with wild abandon, glancing around warily to make sure no one is looking, and then gleefully brushing the eraser droppings to the floor! The writing bogeyman attacks me while I’m enjoying erasing though. The dreadful thought of running out of eraser before pencil sends chills up my spine. When the inevitable happens, do I stop erasing or start a new pencil? The Green in me gasps at the thought of the latter, and contemplating the entire dilemma brings brain freeze back with a vengeance.

Fortunately, what’s even better than erasing is crossing stuff out. I like that I can adjust my cross-out style to suit my mood. I use the neat single-line approach when I feel prim and persnickety. I like an elongated Z shape when I’m in a zen-like state. In catatonic moments, I just stab the pencil in the general direction of the paper. My favorite method is to lose myself completely in the moment and obliterate to kingdom come. Take that, you offending words, ha ha!

Having margins is another advantage of writing on paper. I tend to let thoughts spill out however my brain releases them. As self-editing mode kicks in, I bracket paragraphs and use the margins to draw those cool arrows with pointy things on each end that mean “reverse order.” Or I put a big blobby dot on one end and a pointy thing on the other, meaning “move this over here.”

Margins are wonderful places to doodle while your mind takes a powder, gets a cuppa joe, or whatever it’s doing when you can’t find it. Try doodling with your non-dominant hand. You won’t accomplish anything, but you’ll be in awe of your dominant hand! Another way I like to use margins is to write notes to myself. These notes go something like, “Where did this come from?” “What R u thinking?” or “Help! My home planet has ordered me back!!!”

That’s what I call a rough draft. Dotting the i’s, crossing the t’s, and working up the courage to face the blogging-editor screen can wait…